by Nevs Coleman

Battle Royale. With Cheese…

Sat at home introducing Scheele to the great film ‘The Warriors’ (after deciding that if I could help it, I would not being watching anything that Wes Anderson has a hand in again*.) If you don’t know about the Warriors, it looks like this:

It must be at least the fifth time I watched said film, and one great big plot hole smacked me clean in the mouth.

The Warriors need to get home without being killed because all the gangs in New York want them dead for the death of Sirus, right? When they beat up the 1st gang, why don’t they just nick some of their clothes and, I don’t know, NOT look like The Warriors?

Saying that, I did think the film was aching to be re-made. I know the general rule of thought is ‘THIS IS A SACRED WORK AND ALL REMAKES SHALT BE BAD!’ but, if nothing else, a remake will reintroduce the film to the general psyche. Not sure why that’s a bad thing. It’s not like the original film will cease to exist, is it?

Equally,  I’d like to see someone remake ‘If’.

You know, there’s been so many of remakes of Japanese films in the last few years that I’m surprised that no-one’s done the ABSOLUTELY BLOODY AWESOME film BATTLE ROYALE yet.

Go see this film NOW, if you hadn’t already. With me? Okay.

Now imagine Bill Murray as Takeshi Kitano smacking up mouthy teenagers with a knife and stuff. Where would we FIND a small army of precious mouthy fucks to get butchered to fuck by each other?

Oh, I don’t know…….HERE?

HERE?

Or just for the balance that I’m pushing her work in this column, the gorgeous Kayla Hillier’s most bestest show in the world…

I’d pay good money to see this lot hacked to pieces. Is that just me?

Hello Hollywood…

In other news, just for a giggle, I’m making my own comic, much inspired by the artwork to the Rage Against The Machine record ‘Renegades’. More on this as I actually get on with it. It’ll be called ‘Filthy Blues’, and if I can get my arse in gear, it’ll come with a CD of our gig at the Hope & Anchor from a few weeks back.

That’s me for now. As promised, here’s a page of Kayla’s stuff, it’s the beginning of her comic, GALAVANT, which is about her trip to the UK. Go say hello to her, if only because she’ll abuse the word ‘epic’ in ways you’ll not have thought of before…

*Just to answer the question before it comes up: all of Wes Anderson’s films seem to say ‘Rich Americans are a bit neurotic!’. To which I can only say ‘Boo Fucking Hoo!’

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One response

  1. Kayla Hillier

    NO HACKING BUFFY PEOPLE TO BITS! :O!
    *shakes fist*

    But thank you, thank you for the webcomic mention mister!

    April 21, 2010 at 13:06

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